And on the fifth day they surfed. Surf lessons were at Playa La Pared in Luquillo. The waves were rough, the red flags were out, and the “Strong Rip Current – DO NOT ENTER” signs had Coco a little worried but our professional surf instructors assured us it was a perfect day for surf lessons. They also don’t get paid if the lessons get canceled so we probably would have had the lessons even if there was a hurricane. But you don’t skip your surf lessons on Unhinged Spring Break.
Bobcat, Queen B, Shady Keith and Kitty took pictures and provided encouragement while the rest of us learned how to ride some waves. Yes, there were wipeouts and many of us ended up in the soup at some point, but everyone had a blast and by the end we had all at least ridden one wave.
After working up a gnarly appetite making the ocean our bitch, we headed to the Luquillo kiosks for lunch. After an initial scare when we mistakenly believed Tito had replaced Willy as the go to roadside oyster and clam vendor, we found Willy and his clams and homemade hot sauce a little further down the stretch. Bonus points were given to Bobcat, Trudy, and Bobby Newport for slurping down some highway oysters! There was however a brief moment of sadness as we realized the person who would appreciate buying $2 oysters out of a cooler under a tent by the side of the road was not with us and that Greg would probably never get to experience wrapping his lips around Willy’s fat chewy mollusk meat.
After a trip up and down the line of shops and restaurants, Kitty picked out Jibaro’s Borinquen Restaurant as a suitable lunch spot – mostly for the terrace seating overlooking the ocean. And the sangria. (Puerto Ricans often call the island “Borinquen,” a derivation of Borikén, its Indigenous Taíno name, which is popularly said to mean “Land of the Valiant Lord”)
Lunch was good. Coco didn’t believe anything Michael our host said, or in her words, “He’s full of shit.” Trudy, Bobby Newport, and Chief showed that they are responsible drinkers by ordering the small sangrias and resisting the temptation of the larger souvenir cup sized drinks.
After lunch was a trip to a secluded beach. The hike to get to Playa Colora was supposed to be the adventure. But it turns out when there is an island wide power outage, the drive with all the traffic lights out ends up being one of the most challenging adventures on an island experiencing a complete black out. Every intersection was chaos. You know the rule that traffic lights without power should be treated like a stop sign? Yeah, that’s not a thing in Puerto Rico.
We all made it to Seven Seas beach eventually and Honey Badger, Coco, Chief, and Shady Keith all compared sunburned feet trying to decide whose was worse. Unfortunately, to get to Playa Colora, it’s a mile hike through the forrest which was happening even if you sunburned your feet so bad you had to do it barefooted. Which they did.
The hike took us to a pristine, secluded beach where everyone took pictures and enjoyed the sand, surf, and sun for a while. The hike back included a live instagram stream. Shout out to all the Unhinged Spring Break followers that joined us remotely!
The Schmidts stopped at a powerless Walmart for a few more groceries and supplies on the way back while the rest of us went back to Pancho’s Paradise to find the generator plugging away keeping the power going for us in the main house and guest/trap house. Some swimming, short naps for some, showers and then dinner at the house before game night was to start promptly at 7:30pm. Thank god Bobby Newport set his alarm for 7:27pm and was able to make it in time.
Cipher was our Gamemaster for the evening and pulled off a very successful Unhinged Spring Break experience. Moose Master was the newly introduced game and was by far the hit of the night. Lots of laughs, lots of flipping off Shady Keith, and of course trying to talk with your eyes closed while not showing your teeth and holding your card without the use of your thumbs. There were winners and losers of course, but really everyone was a winner. Some just ended up the night with more Unhinged Spring Break points than others.
Speaking of points. Bobby Newport has started to really run away with the point lead. His “I don’t give a crap about anything other than smoking and drinking and having a good time” attitude has really impressed Moose. But everyone added some serious numbers to their totals yesterday. Bobcat finally figured out trying too hard for points usually has the opposite effect but making Seinfeld references will probably get you a point every time. Coco’s creativity in wrapping her feet in towels to survive the hike to the beach was also awarded for its creativity and not caring how ridiculous it looked.
Everyone was worn out by bed time and will sleep well from all the surfing, hiking, stressful driving and diesel fumes from the generator tonight!
